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The top 5 regrets of the dying

Anna Sandner
18.7.2024
Translation: Katherine Martin

What do people think about just before they die? And if they were given one more chance at life, what would they do with it? In her many years of working as a palliative carer, Australian Bronnie Ware collected the answers to these questions and recorded them in her book.

Please note: the book isn’t yet available in all countries.

Stay true to yourself

What won’t we humans do to please other people? Some people build their lives around other people’s expectations. In doing so, they forget the person who’s actually most important in their lives: themselves. Ware didn’t just hear this advice from Grace, an elderly lady she cared for during the final weeks of her life. It was what she heard most from people approaching death.

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself.
From Bronnie Ware’s The Five Regrets of the Dying

Grace was married for over 50 years. From the outside, her life looked picture-perfect. Secretly, however, Grace spent years dreaming of gaining independence from her tyrannical husband. But she never took the leap necessary to break up with him. On her deathbed, she wrests a promise from her carer to do things differently in her own life.

Hope-fuelling stories from the end of life

In a similar vein to Grace’s story, Ware tells many of the life stories of people she cared for during their final months, weeks and days. She shares the thoughts people reveal honestly at the end of their lives – their doubts, fears and failures. Then, she links them to her own life, reflecting on the lessons she can learn from her patients.

Time and again, the dying give her advice in their final moments. In her book, she tells these stories with great sensitivity and describes how they’ve shaped her own life.

This book is far from a collection of empty platitudes and advice. Instead, it’s a journey down different paths through life. A plea to reflect on what really matters to you and how you want to use your time on earth before you’re on your deathbed.

This is an edited version of the original article.
Header image: Beytlik/Pexels

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Science editor and biologist. I love animals and am fascinated by plants, their abilities and everything you can do with them. That's why my favourite place is always outside - somewhere in nature, preferably in my wild garden.


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