What do people feel who only feel alive when they are violent? How can it be understood that those who are pathologically obedient to others, despite being deeply traumatized or hurt by them? Perpetrators and victims maintain the most dangerous symbiosis, seeking one another throughout their entire lives. Left and right extremism, violence in its most hidden forms, and open terror against others and oneself: these are the endpoints of the spiral of destruction that seems to turn as if by natural necessity. Can it not be stopped? What is to be done? Arno Gruen advocates for a culture of inner autonomy that does not stage itself as strength or claim superiority. Autonomy is alignment with one's own feelings and needs. Those who are truly free do not need poses, do not play roles, and do not engage in public self-presentation.