How can we see ourselves more clearly - without self-blame? Thomas Gessner explores this question in his book by explaining how unconscious love shapes our lives out of an inner necessity. From the present, he looks in the first part of the book at our inner echoes from the past and when they still influence us today. When do we act, feel, and think like teenagers, children, or unborn babies in the womb? It becomes evident how dependent love ensures our survival and makes no mistakes. In the second part of the book, he sheds light on the other pole of love, self-love. It focuses on growth and has no interest in survival and control. It seeks development and devotion and can lead us to a more relaxed inner adulthood. The third part discusses how and why we unconsciously use survival strategies.