After experiencing a situation where we feel like victims, we often treat ourselves with indifference and distance. But why? We tend to believe the reality of the perpetrator more than our own. We place their reality above our own. In doing so, we disregard ourselves and thus permanently connect with the perpetrator, even if we don’t want to. It’s as if we send a part of ourselves into exile. From that moment on, this foreign element is with us, something we have taken on from the perpetrator, a part of them. Like a vacuum, it spreads and is not easily shaken off. Gradually, some changes become noticeable, starting with our thinking. Most people are not really aware that we have a choice in this matter. The choice we have is precisely whether to adopt the negative mindset of the perpetrator or to refuse to do so.