Why are the brass players actually seated at the back of the orchestra? Quite simply! If they were in the front, you wouldn't be able to hear the strings – and every conductor (not just Karajan) would have a hairstyle like a blow-dryer. This collection of the best jokes about woodwind and brass players presents an important orchestra group in all too human light through 222 "true" anecdotes. There are some jabs taken, but also some strong comebacks! Want a sample? The clarinet virtuoso Giora Feidman was invited to dinner at the home of an American banker. Naturally, it was expected that Feidman would entertain the guests with his playing on this occasion. However, the virtuoso appeared without his instrument, and the disappointment was great. – Feidman, in perfect politeness: "I am terribly sorry, but my clarinet is not cooperating!".