Movie review: «Black Widow» is finally here – to disappoint

First off: this review contains no spoilers. You’ll only see what’s apparent from the already released trailers.

Natasha Romanoff (Scarlett Johansson) aka Black Widow is dead. That’s not a spoiler by the way, we clearly saw her pass on in «Avengers: Endgame» around two years ago. She sacrificed herself. Not just to save humanity from a mad titan. But to rescue her new family.

Then suddenly, along comes the «Black Widow» movie, saying: nope, not really, there’s another family. Yet despite it all, its tale surrounding a painful past doesn’t really ever go anywhere. Let’s dive into it.

Demons of old

Once recruited as an orphan by the KGB, Natasha Romanoff was handed over to the Red Room, a top-secret Soviet brainwashing and training programme that turns young women into arguably the world’s deadliest and most elite assassins – Black Widows. This was her story.

Was.

Through the years, Natasha changed sides. First as a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, then as a member of the Avengers, whom she would come to find as her family. One that, during the movie’s events, is going through some hardships. «Black Widow» takes place between the events of «Captain America: Civil War» and «Avengers: Infinity War.» The status quo: most superheroes have split into two camps. Once again, Natasha must find her place in the world.

Then suddenly, Natasha receives a mysterious package. A call for help – from the past. And before she knows it, Taskmaster appears, a seemingly unstoppable killing machine, controlled by the man who once handed her over to the Red Room programme.

Brutal action – without any impact

It’s hard not to notice where relatively unknown director Cate Shortland drew most of her inspiration. Because «Black Widow» is primarily one thing: a hard-hitting spy thriller. Interesting. Especially during the first half of the film, which doesn’t feel like a Marvel superhero movie at all.

This is thanks to its visual style, which Shortland, together with cinematographer Gabriel Beristain, unabashedly ripped off from the Russo brothers, directors of «Captain America: The Winter Soldier.» Both there as here, the image seems cold and desaturated, and the action mostly handmade. Such as when, for example, the Taskmaster is ploughing through the streets of Budapest akin to Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Terminator. He’s unimpressed, purely driven by his pursuit of the elusive Black Widow.

CGI thunderstorms? Nope. Explosions. They seem real. Cars flying every which way? Definitely more than a mere fender bender. Their destruction is played as close to reality as possible.

What impressed me even more was the martial arts display in the film. No wonder: we’re talking about the deadliest female killing machines on the planet. And then there’s Taskmaster. Allow me to explain: in both film and comics, he possesses photographic reflexes. This means that he can immediately imitate things he sees. For example, if he catches Natasha Romanoff doing backflips to take out her opponents, he can do it too. Just like that.

For longtime Marvel fans in particular, this always provides wonderful moments of clarity. At one point, he studies clips from «Iron Man 2» to learn Natasha’s fighting techniques. Later, he throws his shield like Captain America, extends his claws like Black Panther and shoots arrows as accurately as Hawkeye.

Simply awesome. At least in theory.

In truth, «Black Widow» misses a great opportunity. Namely, the chance to move away from Marvel-esque action, at least a bit, towards something closer to John Wick. I don’t want to just see the punches, kicks and fights. I want to feel them. As closely as possible. This worked brilliantly in David Leitch’s «John Wick» series. And even better in «Atomic Blonde», also directed by Leitch. There, protagonists get tired during their fights and sustain injuries that have consequences.

Director Shortland is visibly trying to stage the action in the spirit of David Leitch. You can see that in every shot, each one featuring lovingly and meticulously rehearsed choreography which packs a proper punch.

The difference: even if Natasha and her counterpart really go at it like John Wick, it’s all forgotten after about two minutes. No gaping wound. Not even a scratch! No one gets out of breath. That’s okay when superheroes such as Thor or Captain Marvel get down to business. But not Natasha, an ordinary human without superpowers.

Sure, «Black Widow» isn’t aimed at the same target audience as «John Wick» or «Atomic Blonde». Still, I’m sure there could’ve been more stringency in the action, without risking an 18+ age rating. After all, it didn’t happen with «Captain America: The Winter Soldier» or «Captain America: Civil War» either. And they really went for it there, too.

Here’s the thing with patchwork families

Oh well. In basic terms, the action is still fun. All the right ingredients are there: a gritty spy thriller, Natasha’s past, a Terminator knockoff who mimics any martial arts used against him – so far, so awesome.

But then the second half of the film stumbles over a script that doesn’t quite know whether it still wants to be a spy thriller or rather a Marvel-CGI thunderstorm extraordinaire. And as if the sombre tone from before wasn’t enough, patchwork family drama is suddenly added to the mix.

Um, what is this?

Don’t get me wrong, actor David Harbour gives a delightfully clichéd, yet simultaneously likeable Red Guardian who’s basically nothing but a Soviet caricature of Captain America. He’s also sort of the father figure in a patchwork family that Natasha Romanoff was apparently once a part of. Regrettably, this whole dynamic pops into the MCU just as fast as it’s likely to disappear. Add to that Melina Vostokoff, played by Rachel Weisz, the mum, the brains of the family.

Starting to see the clichés?

The only real winner here is Natasha’s sister Yelena Belova, played with a whole heap of sassy charisma by newcomer Florence Pugh. She, too, once had to undergo the Red Room programme. That’s why the relationship she and Natasha maintain – their conversations – is also the most revealing when it comes to exploring what demons drive Natasha to this day.

And I can already tell you this much: the chances that we’ve seen Yelena for the last time in the MCU are slim.

What could have been (sigh)

I was hoping that «Black Widow» would shed light on Natasha Romanoff’s past. Her traumas, her training, all the blood that Loki said was on her hands in «Avengers» – and what role Jeremy Renner’s Clint Barton aka Hawkeye played in washing Natasha clean of it. None of this finds its way into the film. Or only marginally, at most.

Instead, «Black Widow» mostly feels like a Disney+ series that also happens to be in theatres. An «Adventure of the Week» story in which we learn a thing or two about the main character without really going into depth.

It’s all just missed opportunities.

Come on: even just the Red Room concept itself could fill a movie on its own. The institution itself. The brainwashing. All those inhumane acts of cruelty. In the comics, selected girls are subjected to daily exhaustive close combat training, both in acrobatics and tactical skills. Occasionally, two girls are then chosen to compete against each other to the death. Only the winner survives; no weakness is tolerated in the Red Room.

On large projector screens, the girls watch movies such as «Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs» interspersed with subliminal messages. Fear. Paranoia. Horror. And at night, their hands and legs are tied to the bed frame to prevent anyone from escaping.

The programme also includes the use of weapons. Target practice doesn’t only take place on dummies. Sometimes the girls shoot real people – to make killing easier later on. Finally, as a closing ceremony, the girls’ uterus and ovaries are removed so that they can no longer bear children. To stop anything even remotely important from getting in the way of upcoming agents on their mission.

As you can see, that’s pretty cruel. But also incredibly more exciting and impressive.

My verdict

Here’s what I would’ve wanted from a «Black Widow» movie: the horrifying return of a miserable past that has been repeatedly hinted at, but never really explained, in the 23 MCU films to date. For me, this should’ve been the long overdue solo film for one of the most exciting and in-depth MCU characters.

Sure, «Black Widow» is full of spectacular and well-rehearsed action. In addition, there’s some great fight choreography, which could’ve admittedly been a bit more stringent, and the humour, which Marvel typically does quite well.

Is the whole thing solid? Yes. But not solid enough, in my opinion. I’m missing the depth suggested by the script through the appearance of the patchwork family. Regrettably, the movie never really gets there. «Black Widow» is thus a film that, while fun, doesn’t really tell me anything new about the character that is Natasha Romanoff.

«Black Widow» can be seen in cinemas from July 8 and on Disney+ from July 9 via paid VIP access (29.90 Swiss francs). Starting on October 6, «Black Widow» will be available to all Disney+ accounts, even without VIP access.